Relationships are described in so many different ways that it has become rather difficult to know what you should and should not expect in your own relationship. We attain a lot of our knowledge about so-called ‘good’ relationships from films, soaps operas and social media. However, to be able to replicate what we see in the reel world and apply it to the real world is not always easy.
Below are five simple truths about relationships that you should be prepared to witness in your own love life.
1. Myth: All Relationships Must Begin With Passion
It is not necessary for you to experience love at first sight or feel an intense desire for your partner when you start out a relationship. If that instant spark or ‘bolt of lightening’ is missing upon first appearances, it doesn’t always mean that there’s no potential for chemistry.
At first you may be attracted to your partner simply because you feel a sense of security and comfort when you are with them. And that is okay. The stronger feelings can grow over time. True love exists but it can’t just spring from the first week of dating. So, don’t panic and push away that adorable man who makes you smile simply because he hasn’t transformed you into a sappy love-sonnet-writing Juliet yet. Just enjoy the moment and the rest will come naturally.
2. Myth: Strong Couples Share The Same Interests
It is a big misunderstanding to think that you must share the same hobbies as your partner in order for the two of you to be compatible. Yes, it would mean that you both would have more to talk about initially. Nevertheless, it could get quite boring to hear similar experiences from your partner.
On the other hand, if you seem to enjoy ice-skating while your partner is fond of rock music, it would mean that you have the option to make the bond with your other half even stronger by introducing them to a whole new world. On top of that, having personal interests makes you appear more attractive to your partner.
After all, opposites attract!
3. Myth: Strong Couples Avoid Fights
Another typical stereotype in relationships is that couples that are happy with each other never fight. Cue sarcastic laughter.
In reality, if a person does not fight with their partner, it means that they do not care anymore. In fact, if you never seem to argue with your partner over anything, it means that the two of you have given up on the relationship and have emotionally detached from each other.
However, this does not mean that it is healthy in any relationship for a couple to abuse each other or even fight physically. An occasional quarrel will not hurt anyone and fighting with your partner can even help you understand him or her better. Added bonus? There’s always makeup sex to look forward too!
4. Myth: Strong Couples Extend Their Love For Their Partners To Their Extended Family As Well
You shouldn’t be surprised if your partner seems to get along with you but not your friends and family. After all, they chose to be in a relationship with you, not the people who are related to you. You too are not obliged to unconditionally love your partner’s friends and family.
You must have a conversation with your partner regarding the extent to which the two of you would like to involve third parties in your relationship. It is always good to set boundaries early on in the partnership in order to ensure that nobody feels insulted.
5. Myth: Happy Couples Are Always Together
No matter how much you love your partner, there will always come a time in your relationship where you will want to spend some time away. This is not because you have stopped loving your partner; it just means that you need some personal space.
If your partner truly loves and understands you, they will not hesitate to grant you that space. And, FYI, never feel guilty about it. Despite what your #couplegoals friend on Facebook may lead you to believe, everyone needs some me-time. In fact, spending some time away from your partner can help reignite the fire in your relationship for let’s face it – distance makes the heart fonder!
Being able to identify and eliminate these relationship biases before beginning a romantic venture can help you enjoy a strong and healthy relationship with your partner. It does not mean that you shouldn’t expect anything from your partner. However, lowering your expectations help you take a relationship to the next level at your own pace. It is always beneficial to take your time to understand the feelings you share with your partner before taking things forward.
Once the two of you are familiar with each other’s strengths and flaws, you will truly appreciate one another and share a very strong bond. Who knows, perhaps, you may even enter the fabled realm of eternal love. After all, hope springs eternal!